The news this week was dominated still by the sexual misconduct of the male feminist allies who turned out to be miscreants after all. From John Conyers to several more members of Vice Media, the sexual misconduct train continues to (t)roll through the valley of the hapless women, touching, feeling, harassing, and raping its way toward Respectville.
However, beyond the gasping gropes of our Congressmen and (not so) trusted media representatives, two more stories were the talk of the town this week. The release of the Nintendo Switch exclusive from Monolith Soft, Xenoblade Chronicles 2, launched and with it came a bevy of conversations centered around people getting triggered by the big anime titties. On the other side of the fence Bungie managed to drag themselves through the mud by artificially suppressing the XP gains for their most ardent of players, creating nothing short of a furor in the Destiny 2 community. These stories and more in this December 2nd, 2017 edition of the Weekly Recap.
Liberal Media Goes A Step Too Far
Sometimes parody hits that sweet spot between irony and actualism that allows us to chuckle at the possibility of something that’s absurd but not too far outside the realms of possibility. We think to ourselves “Ha, this is funny because this is too ridiculous to be true.” Well, that used to be the case until Liberal media went full retard. In fact, Liberal media went so full-retard that a feminist parody site actually closed up shop because feminists and SJWs have become more retarded than the satirical parody that they were producing on the site. Sad times we live in. And speaking of Liberals going full retard… John Conyers stepped aside from his position at the House Judiciary Committee while an investigation takes place into his alleged sexual misconduct. There’s a new Battle Royle game in the works under the Tencent publishing label called Europa, and it’s actually a heck of a lot better than you may have been thinking. And Sega has embraced meme culture by adding a free Sanic DLC pack to Sonic Forces.
Bungie Gets Caught With Their Hands In Destiny’s Pants
There’s nothing more embarrassing than getting caught out in public, fondling the instrument of greed for all to see. That’s exactly what happened when gamers found out that they were being royally screwed by Bungie’s attempt at masturbating the monies right out of gamers’ pockets by corking the XP gains in Destiny 2. Now Bungie is reeling and Activision is seething. VR hardware sales have increased over the quarter, totaling one million. Sadly, there still aren’t many good VR games available for the HMDs. Speaking of good games… a new distributor known as Strictly Limited Games will be releasing physical copies of indie titles for PS4, PS Vita and the Nintendo Switch. So you’ll no longer have to rely on digital distribution only to get your hands on select indie and mid-budget titles. And the developers behind The Last Guardian are now hiring for their latest project, whatever that may be. Hopefully it won’t take a decade to finish this time.
SJWs Get Triggered By Xenoblade Chronicles 2’s Boobs
It doesn’t take much to make the perpetually offended… well, offended. In this case, however, a group of SJWs have been complaining almost nonstop about the boob sizes and boob jiggle in Xenoblade Chronicles 2, even though the boob physics aren’t even that noticeable in the game. Data miners discovered that EA already had cosmetic items implemented in Star Wars: Battlefront II, but they were disabled for some reason. What’s crazy is that EA’s CFO claimed that there were no cosmetics in the game because it would break the canon. Furi is set to arrive on the Nintendo Switch starting next year in 2018. And speaking of the Switch, a new My Hero Academy game is on the way. And Vice ended up firing three of their employees for sexual misconduct. Reset the counter.
EA Keeps Pay-to-Win Microtransactions In EA Sports UFC 3
Even though EA is still getting hammered hard by the gaming community over their pay-to-win microtransactions in Star Wars: Battlefront II, they’re still intent on keeping them alive and well in all their upcoming games, including EA Sports UFC 3. The upcoming title was announced to have pay-to-win microtransactions via a video update from IGN, and gamers weren’t happy. The closed beta sign-ups for Naruto to Boruto: Shinobi Striker are now live for PS4 owners. Worries mount over Spike Chunsoft’s new LA-based localization outfit set in California, with many gamers hoping that the company doesn’t hire in SJWs to ruin their games. DayZ is finally set to launch in 2018 on PC along with the Xbox One, with the devs promising that they will graduate from Early Access next year. The Nintendo Switch turned out to be the best selling device on Black Friday, and Nancy Pelosi has finally called on Congressman John Conyers to resign from his position at the House due to the sexual misconduct claims.
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