What a stupid week in news. Obviously the most asinine thing that happened this week is some thirsty beta orbiter from YouTube who has never seen a vagina in person since he exited his mother’s bloody, gaping hole back when he was a butt-naked newborn, decided to completely terminate Shirrako’s YouTube account because Shirrako dared to beat up and throw an obnoxiously annoying feminist NPC in Red Dead Redemption 2 into a pig pen. Yes, some pencil-necked, scrawny-armed, soy-guzzling, connoisseur of pubic-hair sniffing hailing from the grace-forsaken state of California actually nuked a YouTuber’s account because the YouTuber dared to beat up a loud-mouthed virtual feminist. Let that bit of nonsense swim around within your brain juices for a bit before you continue to the next part.
Blizzard’s Diablo Immortal fiasco managed to carry itself all the way through the entire week, with the company managing to make one misstep and blunder after another, including announcing that all their best developers are currently working on mobile games at the moment. That’s obviously not what most gamers wanted to hear. These pathetic stories and more in this November 10th, 2018 edition of the Weekly Recap.
The Ballad Of Diablo Immortal’s Soy-Filled Claque
The announcement of Diablo Immortal did not go down well with gamers at all. The reveal, which took place at this year’s opening ceremony at BlizzCon in Austin, Texas, was met with lots of recoil from core gamers, as they booed the abomination right off the stage. The media decided to jump in by attacking the gaming community and running to Blizzard’s defense. The latest update to the open-world, prison survival game, SCUM, added the ability to customize your survivalist’s dick – the size and length of it, as well as its color. Be warned, though, a big dick means a smaller brain. The official system requirements for Battlefield V have been revealed, and you can find out if your computer has a big enough vagina to run the game. And you can now run Super Mario Odyssey from start to finish on the new Yuzu Nintendo Switch emulator.
ResetEra Tries To Get Nintendo To Remove Native American Reference From Super Smash Bros
The trolls over at ResetEra tried to invoke the Treehouse localizers to get the Native American references removed from the upcoming Nintendo Switch exclusive, Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. Following the controversy surrounding Diablo Immortal, it turns out that Blizzard has claimed that the game isn’t a reskin of Crusaders of Light, a game being made by the studio they partnered with to make Diablo Immortal. And speaking of Diablo Immortal… EKO Software took the opportunity to burn Blizzard hard with a tweet informing hardcore gamers that Warhammer: Chaosbane won’t be released on mobile devices. And shortly after making its way back onto the Steam store, it turns out that The Key To Home has been banned from Steam once more because Valve claims it contains sexually suggestive content of minors.
YouTube Shuts Down Shirrako’s Channel Because He Killed A Feminist In Red Dead Redemption 2
A bunch of SJW NPCs came to the aid of a feminist NPC in Rockstar Games’ Red Dead Redemption 2, working together like the hive mind that they are to report and get YouTuber Shirrako’s channel shut down because he killed a feminist in Red Dead Reedemtion 2. The NPCs at YouTube came under fire for allowing the SJW NPCs to shut down Shirrako’s channel. Luckily the majority of the gaming community came together to condemn YouTube for acting like non-human NPCs. Shirrako got his account back, but all those other poor saps who couldn’t get the attention of big YouTubers to help them fight back against the machine had their accounts lost to the ether. More games containing loot boxes have been affected by Belgium’s law, which sees them having to remove the loot boxes to comply with the region’s legal system. And Nintendo ended up censoring the Native American references in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate by having them removed after ResetEra and other racists in games journalism complained about not wanting to see Native Americans in the game.
Valve’s Rogue Employee Tries To Reignite Waifu Holocaust
Imagine avoiding certain doom for all waifus after a near anime-Armageddon takes place, just for an employee at Valve to go rogue and attempt to do the same thing again? Well, that’s sort of what’s been happening with some lewd and some not-so-lewd visual novels from Asian developers on Steam recently. The Key To Home developer revealed that the game keeps getting banned off Steam due to a lone female staff member working at Valve. There are already autistic-tier investigations underway to out this faux fräulein for her mischievous behavior that is slowly rotting away at the reputation of Valve. And speaking of females, the playable females in Star Citizen have been delayed into early 2019 due to development hardships. The Neko Works developers didn’t entirely remove all the boob jiggle from the censored PS4 version of Nekopara Vol. 1 and you can still see the titties bounce a bit in the options menu, but don’t expect it to last long. And Activision is feeling the pinch with Destiny 2 given that the game is continuing to be nothing more than a sales failure.
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