Men Killed Charlie’s Angels Reboot, According To Increasingly Nervous Director

As we previously covered  Charlie’s Angel launched to a disastrous box office and earned its rightful place on our Get Woke Go Broke Master List. With time to process the disastrous opening weekend the director has had time to contemplate what caused the movie to fail in the first place.

What do you think the core reason for the movie going broke was? Some will argue it was its overtly woke agenda, while others will contend it was because of the lack luster production, design, and script. I’ll attest because in addition to the previous two most people found out this movie had come out when everyone was mocking it for failing.

As pointed out by Geeks and Gamers and Cheat Sheet, according to Elizabeth Banks the film’s director, producer, and writer, none of that came into play for the movie’s failure. It was because “MEN!” Which I believe is true as I remember at the regional patriarchy meetings we had rigorous discussions following the argument over who is the waifu of the week of whether we needed to do anything about the Charlie’s Angels. I can still remember how half of us were forced to ask: Reboot of what now?

Obviously that didn’t happen, but the way Hollywood talks you would assume there was some cabal that controls all men called The Patriarchy. Probably ran by “The Man,” whose existence leaked in Undercover Brother.

Answering the question of why she blames for the movies failure, and it obviously not being her, she goes into a rambling villain monologue.

“Men will go and see a comic book movie with Wonder Woman and Captain Marvel because that’s a male genre. So even though those are movies about women, they put them in the context of feeding the larger comic book world, so it’s all about, yes, you’re watching a Wonder Woman movie but we’re setting up three other characters or we’re setting up ‘Justice League.’”

Like a crappy Hollywood villain her redundant monolog continues to where she reveals the crux of her sinister plan!

Power!

“By the way, I’m happy for those characters to have box office success. But we need more women’s voices supported with money because that’s the power. The power is in the money.”

At this point Hollywood is becoming a caricature of its own villains. If you were to ask people whether that last quote was said by a Hollywood villain or director many would probably guess villain. As hilarious as this has turned out it is important to remember this is what it is about for these people. Money and Power. They don’t care about diversity, they don’t care about female representation, they just want more money and more influence for themselves. Yet aren’t intelligent enough to not reveal their master plan let alone actually achieve it.

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Seething Chaos of gaming, Kevin has spent an entire lifetime gaming and weebing.

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