Rise of Skywalker Novelization Confirms Palpatine Clone Leak

Leading up to Palpatine’s ultimate victory aka the Rise of Skywalker, the Fandom Menace was greeted nearly weekly with fresh leaks coming out of the movie’s production. Some obviously from disgruntled employees, but at a certain point, even the channels covering and delivering the leaks began to suspect at least some of them were being released intentionally by Disney. In an effort to gauge the hardcore Star War’s fans reactions to the movie that continued to test poorly with test audiences. Continue reading “Rise of Skywalker Novelization Confirms Palpatine Clone Leak”

Rise of Skywalker Bombs at Box Office Leading to Disney Failing to Break Even On Star Wars Purchase

Star Wars the Rise of Skywalker is now an official failure that is questionable whether it will succeed in even breaking Rogue One’s box office by the conclusion of its runtime. Made all the sadder by the fact Disney released an extended cut to bolster box office numbers and push the movie over a Billion leaving its $1.047 Billion box office garnered from two cuts of the movie. Continue reading “Rise of Skywalker Bombs at Box Office Leading to Disney Failing to Break Even On Star Wars Purchase”

Star Wars Episode 9: Duel of the Fates Leaks and is Vastly Better than Rise of Skywalker

As Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker continues to limp toward the one billion dollar mark the beleaguered show has suffered yet another humiliating blow from the leak of Colin Trevorrow’s original Episode 9 script. Poetically named Duel of the Fates, Trevorrow took his movie in a radically new direction than what Disney had previously put to screen. In that his movie, unlike the prior two, not only was a Star Wars movie, but featured actual character development. Especially Rey who was transformed from the Mary Sue who could do it all, into a more compartmentalized role in their group dynamic. Continue reading “Star Wars Episode 9: Duel of the Fates Leaks and is Vastly Better than Rise of Skywalker”

Rumored Leaks Blame Disney Not J.J. Abrams For Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker Failure

Before delving into the latest leaks it is important to stress that this in unconfirmed information that cannot be independently verified. Previous confirmed leaks have indicated there is a J.J. cut so the information provide here after may paint a picture of what transpired from the J.J. Abrams camp. Continue reading “Rumored Leaks Blame Disney Not J.J. Abrams For Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker Failure”

J.J. Abrams and Disney Receive Death Threats Over Rise of Skywalker

(Warning this Article Contains Spoilers)

Upon reading the title you probably rolled your eyes and said “sure they are.” After all who could blame you after the sheer number of times they’ve cried wolf? If consumers are saying they’re unhappy, magic death threats that they’ll never share proof of manifest from the ether, but never leave any proof of their existence. Continue reading “J.J. Abrams and Disney Receive Death Threats Over Rise of Skywalker”

Rise of Skywalker Co-writer Wishes Movie was Split Into Two Movies Before Blaming George Lucas

Many unfortunate souls who have ventured to the movie theaters these holidays not believing the Rise of Skywalker could be the affront before God, Satan, Odin, and Sol combined left theaters with mostly negative reactions to the movie, but also a distinct feeling that it could have been divided into two movies. Continue reading “Rise of Skywalker Co-writer Wishes Movie was Split Into Two Movies Before Blaming George Lucas”

Rumors Claim Kathleen Kennedy Will Soon Be Fired From LucasFilm

It’s no secret Disney needed Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker to succeed. After what Rian Johnson and their PR team did to the brand already, suffering under Kennedy’s identity politics the brand has gone from a right to print money to an outright money pit for Disney.  Desperate for the movie to succeed they had it undergo months of re-shoots, spent untold hundreds of millions on its marketing and yet despite box office estimates dropping multiple times the movie has opened to a pitiable $176 million domestically, according to Den of Geek, and outright bombing in China. Continue reading “Rumors Claim Kathleen Kennedy Will Soon Be Fired From LucasFilm”

Latest Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker Trailer Confirms Leaks

One thing in current year that is becoming increasingly bizarre is what hills people will choose to die on. With the Rise of Skywalker approaching its release, we’ve been hearing from a steady stream of leaks that the movie is an absolute disaster with test audiences and the plot itself is an absolute dumpster fire. Continue reading “Latest Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker Trailer Confirms Leaks”

Rumor: Star Wars Test Screening so Bad Paid Audience Wanted to Leave

Rumors have emerged from Doomcock the ever reliable super villain and cultural critic from an insider source claiming the latest test screenings of Rise of Skywalker were a disaster of galactic portions. As Doomcock himself has shown skepticism towards the validity of these rumors we’ve held off on talking about them. Continue reading “Rumor: Star Wars Test Screening so Bad Paid Audience Wanted to Leave”

Disney Suspected of Buying Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker Tickets

Once again Disney is getting criticized for potentially buying out theaters to prop up the sales figures for another one of their potential failures. As The Rise of Skywalker continues its desperate last minute re-shoots, word has begun spreading across various media and social media profiles that Disney has once again been caught mass purchasing tickets. Continue reading “Disney Suspected of Buying Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker Tickets”

Star Wars: Rise Of Skywalker’s Final Trailer Still Doesn’t Explain What The Heck The Movie Is About

Star Wars Rise of Skywalker

This is the final home stretch for the new trilogy of Star Wars films starring Rey “I can do everything without a last name” and I honestly couldn’t tell what the message of this saga has been, what they were attempting to do, or what the general gist was up to this point. Rey was one of the most under-developed characters in the history of trilogies, and the only interesting character – no scratch that, there were no interesting characters. Anyway, the final trailer for this trifecta of terribleness is finally here and I couldn’t begin to tell you what it means or what it’s about. Continue reading “Star Wars: Rise Of Skywalker’s Final Trailer Still Doesn’t Explain What The Heck The Movie Is About”

Bob Iger Admits George Lucas Hates Disney’s Star Wars and How They Ignored His Vision

Star Wars

Disney’s Star Wars is not in a good spot, to put it mildly. Toy sales, the indomitable juggernaut of the Star Wars brand, continue their downward spiral that began years ago. Star Wars Galaxy’s Edge continues to be virtually empty with reports of the longest line being a two hour wait for the bar. Solo: A Star Wars Story commercially flopped and Disney has already began lowering expectations for ticket sales of Episode 9 with the series going on hiatus after its release. Continue reading “Bob Iger Admits George Lucas Hates Disney’s Star Wars and How They Ignored His Vision”

Star Wars Episode 9: Rise Of Skywalker Trailer Is Basically Just More Of Rey Being A Mary Sue

Star Wars Episode 9 Rise of Skywalker

Disney finally dropped the official Star Wars Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker teaser trailer for the upcoming film during the Star Wars Celebration event. The two minute trailer spends half its time still trying to make Rey look like some super badass Jedi, which could only siphon from some viewers a scoff and a sigh. Continue reading “Star Wars Episode 9: Rise Of Skywalker Trailer Is Basically Just More Of Rey Being A Mary Sue”