I’m pretty much willing to watch anything, but wow does the movie Kung Fu Yoga starring Jackie Chan look absolutely awful.
The trailer did the movie no favors by creating a hodgepodge of some of the most nonsensical scenes and plot that seems like someone took a bunch of different ideas, hired Jackie Chan, put some kung-fu, Bollywood elements, high-speed chase scenes and a few comedic hijinks into a blender and then pressed puree.
The plot for the film makes absolutely no sense at all based on watching the trailer. You can see what my mean by watching it for yourself below, courtesy of JoBlo.
So Jackie Chan is some sort of adventurer-archeologist that travels to India looking for some ancient artifact. I don’t know who the “other man” is or who the Indian woman is but they’re there for a “job” that makes no sense. I’m assuming they’re supposed to be recovering the artifact? They don’t make it clear what the job is exactly.
Some other villain appears to steal something (I guess the artifact?) and then Jackie Chan and his band of misfit adventurers have to escape from the villain or retrieve the artifact… I guess? They don’t make it very clear what’s going on and the trailer hops around showcasing expensive cars getting trashed, a lion in the back of an SUV, some people trapped by hyenas, some guy doing slapstick comedy, and what appears to be Jackie Chan doing a traditional Bollywood dance number.
The whole thing looks like an expensive, epic mess.
I didn’t think it was possible to make such a big budget movie look so terrible within the span of two minutes, but whoever the marketing team is behind this film managed to do just that.
So in case there’s any hope for this film, what they need to do is release a second trailer and follow a few steps:
1) Outline why Jackie Chan is going to India and why the artifact is important to/for him
2) Outline why the villains want the artifact so the audience has an idea of what the stakes are
3) Clearly explain why or how his team will help him retrieve the artifact so we care who they are
4) Intersperse some of the plot elements with the action scenes so we have a clear idea of how the action ties into the story.
5) That’s it. You can stop reading the list.
If they can produce a better trailer next time maybe it won’t look so terrible. Then again, maybe it’s just a terrible movie, heck I don’t know. Anyway, the film is due for release at some point in 2017. And if Netflix wasn’t a haven for no-name indies and homebrew film projects, you might expect to see it on there in the near future.
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