Monsters Confirms Apocalypse Cow is Still Happening, Blames Radio Silence on Story Rewrite
Apocalypse Cow

Winter 2017 was when Apocalypse Cow’s Steam page went live, describing itself as a Tarantino produced Pixar animated film. That means mayhem; absurd gunfights, slow-mo fireworks, rapidly erratic character dialogues and Samuel L. Jackson.

Cartoony visuals for the kids. The script’s pretty out there as well; think a fantasy game world of much joy before things go horribly wrong. The teaser mentions something about CandyWorld’s inhabitants playing gods and the tyranny of one Cow of The Apocalypse known as The Jaeger, while now an electric storm is brewing because some mistakes can’t be undone.

I don’t know what that means but it’s enough to have Penny, a mildly unhinged member of the Game Walker species, set out to find her friend’s missing robotic cow from across CandyWorld. That sounds like something Tarantino would cook up alright, especially with the quality voice acting and music of the trailer, but developer Monsters hasn’t been very impressed with itself.

So after announcing Apocalypse Cow’s Xbox One release in the month of March, it dropped off the radar, ceased all marketing communications, and decided upon a narrative rewrite. In a nutshell, it’s being expanded in scope to the point where the game now features new weapons, abilities, strategic boss fights, sentient worlds and plenty of Hollywood storytelling material.

Plus a skip button if you don’t believe them. The team’s most recent announcement after the public hiatus, dated 22nd August, also describes more than 10+ hours of content as opposed to the game’s previous 5-6.

As for the game-play features themselves, Apocalypse Cow features – or at least featured – the ability to freeze time. Nothing unusual if I’m terribly frank, with the usual assortment of weapons, hardcore difficulty and co-operative game-play even.

Action was additionally described as part-comedic, part-chaos – where each battle was a carefully planned puzzle, non-penalizing, and demanding of greater dexterity, sharper platforming and humor than your typical side scroller.

All of this is subject to change now more than ever, which is all the more interesting considering this isn’t the first time Apocalypse Cow has undergone a rewrite of sorts. See for instance the game’s 2014 Greenlight pitch, where it read, sounded and looked like something else.

Which isn’t a bad thing, yes? You can follow along by adding it to your Steam wish list thing.


Computer engineer turned whimsical games content writer circa Christmas, 2014. I'm at and do a lot more.

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